let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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