I feel like I'm in dance class right now
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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