you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
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