I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
