Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Randomize
