he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
