today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
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