Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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