thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize