Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused