He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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