Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
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Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
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I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
My life is pants optional.
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