I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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