you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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