It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize