I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
