Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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