i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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