Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
You've changed since you got that strap on
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
