in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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