Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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