these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
