i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.