After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
he puts the penis in happiness.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
