he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
