I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
