Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
