so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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