I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
