I don't think brook has ever known best
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
