what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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