Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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