Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize