Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
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