Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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