Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
