So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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