I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As shirtless as possible
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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