mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Randomize