so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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