Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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