She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
