It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize