I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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