this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
