she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
