I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Farmville is her only friend.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
