I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
