Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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