Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize